Ok so just as it’s inappropriate to be wearing a fur trim parka (or any parka for that matter) or puffa jacket in this weather, it’s also inappropriate for you to be wearing knee-high/mid-calf boots, or any boot, in this weather. This, my dears, is the definitive guide to what the hell to wear on your feet during these summer months. A few of the following shoes are open toe so if you haven’t already, get a pedicure ’cause it’s super rude and inappropriate for you not to. Thanks, on behalf of everyone who will come in eye contact with your toes.
1. Flip Flops
Now, before you start getting excited because you think I’ve given you permission to wear your frat boy flip flops, not all flip flops were created equal. I do not, and will not, tolerate wide strap flip flops, as I have already mentioned no one needs to think that you’re super good at beer pong and can chug beer in record time. No thank you, please stop. Now, Havaianas are reigning supreme over flip flops, and they have a whole load of the skinny strap design, so knock yourself out. Also, if you get your Havainanas from Havaianas stores or Selfridges they can bling them out for you, which is pretty hot.
I’m a pretty huge espadrille fan, you can read all about my quest for the perfect pair(s) here. But please pay close attention to the snout of the shoe (as I like to call it), you don’t want it too round (nubby snout), too pointy (crocodile snout) or too square (cobra snout). Also, I find that the thicker the espadrille the more street-style and laid-back chic the pair is.
The most comfortable of all heels (rejoice) are no doubt a summer fave but there’s a fine line between killing it in your sexy wedges and looking like you could get locked up at any second for soliciting sex. Be fun and creative with your wedges, you don’t have to have a very simple black wedge, throw in an espadrille wedge or subtle sparkle, maybe even a hilarious design (hilarious in a stylish way, like Charlotte Olympia hilarious not actually hilarious).
If you haven’t already, get up to speed with the force of the gladiator in my post here.
5. Flat Sandals
Get Coachella out of your head, it was back in April, ok? So you officially cannot wear anything suede and fringey around your ankles, you also are not Cherokee so stop wearing feathers. Keep Native American inspiration off of your feet, it’s predicatable. Wear black leather, or metallics but no pastels we are done with spring.
6. Slip on sneakers
If you care for sweaty ankles go ahead and wear your high tops in the summer months, but for the rest of us slip-on sneakers are the answer to all life’s problems:
Employment – Versace slip-ons
Family – Givenchy
Health – Jimmy Choo
And for everything else there’s Opening ceremony and Kurt Geiger
Talk to me