We need to talk about online shopping. Both a blessing and a curse – the ability to click around on a screen for a bit and have that thing you liked, land on your doorstep or on your desk (if you’re like me and get everything delivered to work – tactics) in 3-5 working days, or the glorious next day delivery 😍. Wow. The wonders of technology…but what about all the times you end up back at the post office, messy package in hand going through the effort of returns?
I recently bought a knee-length unitard a la Kim K-W. I had a very specific look in mind, I would wear this random, odd piece of clothing underneath a fabulous but sports-luxe parka cinched at the waist with some hella high heels and look 🔥🔥🔥. So I went to buy said unitard – since this is a look I plan on doing once and probably never again, I went to a very popular “cheap” women’s online shop (I shan’t reveal which one – I don’t want to openly drag them as I like a lot of their stuff usually) and threw my money at them electronically.
The next day, the unitard arrived. Described as “slinky” on the website, I assumed we were going down the Lycra/disco pants lane but I took it out of its bag and fiddled with the material which wouldn’t suck anything in but rather accentuate what’s “out”. I put it on and then stood, looking at myself in the mirror…horrified. I turned around, peered over my shoulder and just as I thought…the bitch was see-through 🙄.
There I was, looking like Stone Cold Steve Austin, with a forlorn face and a camel toe. I fumbled for the return paper, filled it in stating my reason for return was “it didn’t suit me”. It certainly did not. It suits no one except the tiny model on the site, her dignity protected by the deceiving lighting.
Let’s be honest, this is not an isolated incident. These online sites and brands have a way of making something look fabulous just because they put it on some girl with a banging body in good lighting. Can they like, stop cat fishing us!? Call Nev.